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[whatam_i]

What demands an answer, but asks no question?
....
A telephone.
And I'm not here to answer mine so please leave a message at the sound of the beep.

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[whatam_i]

[It takes a few hours but he does call her back.]

Colour me intrigued.
What's the favour?

[hawk_shot]

[By the time he calls, she's at the gym, hitting the elliptical machine in the hopes of focusing on her body to distract her mind.

She's panting as she picks up.]

Hey! So, I was wondering, do you think you could have an insider at my mom's prison?

[whatam_i]

[There's a pause.]

You mean like a prison guard or something? Why? Do you want her killed?

[hawk_shot]

What? No! No, of course I don't want her killed! Why would I want her dead? [Kate's eyes widen as she realizes she's had that little outburst in public. She looks around, making sure she's still alone at the gym.

As she speaks up again, she does it in whispers.]

I want to know if she's safe in there. I need someone to watch her back.

[whatam_i]

I don't know, because she upset you?

[This is said as if it's totally normal to stab or kill people who upset you.]

Well I can tell you right now, she probably isn't. It's prison, Kate. Not a country club.
....although it is a rich person jail so maybe it is.
I wouldn't know.

[hawk_shot]

I'm not gonna go around killing people that upset me. Much less my own mom!

[As a woman, she'd have to kill an 85% of the male population if that was the case...]

Exactly, we don't know. So, you think you can sneak or pay an insider? Or what about Oswald? He already thinks we do business and investigated my mom. It wouldn't be too weird to ask him.

[whatam_i]

Okay okay, sorry.

[He says as he rolls his eyes and switches the phone to his other ear.]

I'm not asking Oswald because he won't care.

[To be honest he barely cares as well but he isn't going to mention that.]

And you can probably pay a guard off to give you updates rather easily. Just be warned that those types are only ever really good for information, they're not going to actively stick their necks out for her if there's a prison riot or something.

[hawk_shot]

I'm not asking Oswald to care, I'm asking if he would do the job. I don't know -- I mean, I don't know how to approach a guard and like, ask them to do something illegal for me.

[They're the criminals, can she just pay them.]

Could you do it instead? Or maybe do you know some other criminal that could look after her?

[whatam_i]

He won't. Oswald doesn't "take jobs", Kate. He's a crime boss, not some errand boy and I'm a little offended you would ask that of him.
Or of me.

[Plus Oswald only ever does things to benefit himself and Ed can't see how this would aid him in any way.]

So no.
If you want tabs kept on your mother you find a guard that seems corrupt and you offer him cash to do so.

[hawk_shot]

[Kate goes silent for a moment, letting all of that sink in.]

Why is it that you never want to support me?

[whatam_i]

[He sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose.]

Kate, I love you but I'm not about to drop everything on my plate to go do something as simple as bribe a prison guard.
Trust me, it's NOT hard.

[hawk_shot]

Well, you don't have to do it right now, but we could discuss it and plan it and then you can do it for me. You're the expert in this, babe! And I'm asking you!

[There's a pretty please tone in her voice.]

It's not a big deal for you and it would make me real happy and proud of my criminal boyfriend.

[whatam_i]

And I'm telling you.....No.

[He says with as much patience as he can muster, which isn't all that much.]

It's your mother and your plan so if you really want to do this then you're going to have to get your hands dirty.

[hawk_shot]

Why not? I've been supportive. I did come over with your detective tools when Oswald needed you, even if getting involved in crimes is not my thing.

[And honestly, she sounds a little hurt.]

Things are tough and it would really help if you were with me.

[whatam_i]

Well I guess if you want this idea to happen then it will have to 'become your thing'.
At least a little bit.

[hawk_shot]

What if I need more than just a spy?
What if I need protection for her or even to get her out?

[whatam_i]

I thought you WANTED her to be in jail?
You're sending very mixed messages, my sweet.

[hawk_shot]

I did! Part of me still does.

But Alfred saw her and he
he left me wondering if she's getting hurt in there.
I want her to be locked up and to go to trial, not to be abused in there.
I don't want anyone to be abused in there.

[whatam_i]

That's very sweet and it really shows that you have a big heart....

But...

You're being a teeny tiny bit unrealistic my love.

[hawk_shot]

Because I think you're such a genius you can figure out the impossible?

[whatam_i]

No.
Because you don't want anyone to get abused in prison.

[hawk_shot]

Well, maybe that's a little wishful thinking, but I'm sure there's a way around things.

But for now I really wanna make sure mom is safe.

She's still my mom and I still love her, Ed. Please.

[whatam_i]

There's really not but like I said it does showcase how very sweet you are.

So why not just go visit her and see for yourself?

[hawk_shot]

....

[It's not a tought she has entertained for long. And it speaks volumes of her relationship with her mom, how she'd rather spy on her than just see her, at the moment.]

Even if I see her, she's not gonna tell me if something is wrong.

[whatam_i]

[Ed sighs.]

Kate, aren't you supposed to be training to be a semi detective? You should be perceptive enough to notice something like that even if she's lying to you about it.